No Inferiority, Just Superiority
said " No one can make you feel inferior without your
What a fabulous line. Often we feel inferior to someone
who is better dressed than us. I have a friend whenever she
is in the presence of her friend Sheila who is always
designer dressed and hair salon coiffed, she feels she
cannot be herself and she must dress up to equal Sheila. She
feels intimidated by Sheila who always looks like she
stepped out of Vogue magazine.
Bethany should not feel this way because she always looks
to me well dressed and well coiffed herself. Bethany is a
marvelous person and quite accomplished in her nursing field
whereas Sheila works in a decorating store. Her only claim
to fame is helping rich people pick out the drapery material
and wallpaper rolls to enhance the walls of their new
million dollar homes.
Bethany helps people to recover and gives them hope in
dealing with their life threatening diseases at the hospital
where she works and has been working for twenty-five years.
So Eleanor was right because we are consenting to others
to admire us or else we feel intimidated. Many of us feel
that way in our ballroom dancing. We feel inferior because
someone who has been dancing for twenty-five years looks
quite lovely on the dance floor. We are new at it; they
think and feel very uncomfortable getting out there and
dancing when the experienced couple does their thing.
We should not feel that way. We are competent and will
succeed in this love called ballroom dancing. Like my
professor told me way back in 1968 when I took my first test
at college level at age thirty-three, "Mrs. Clayman, you can
and will do better." I did and still do and his words of
wisdom inspired me throughout the following forty some years
in everything I do and attempt to do.
Do not let anyone take away your desire to dance because
they steer your thoughts to defeat.
They are efficient in making others feel inferior because
in reality they are the inferior ones and we are the
superior folks because we try. We try even when the times
may not be right for starting something new due to finances
and the recession. We try and we are winners of the first
sort because we went out and did something special for us
and our health and our minds and souls.
We are the beneficiaries of doing something for our
bodies and our hearts and our overall mental health.
Ballroom dancing is very addictive and once we feel the
addiction, we are overwhelmed with happiness in looking
forward to a new lesson, going to a dance and dressing up in
nice clothes where we will be seen by others in the similar
My grandson who will be four next week when he saw the
ceramic shoe on my hallway foyer table in January 2009 said
it was a ‘lost shoe." To him it was a real shoe sitting on
the table and he was announcing it to be lost because there
was only one. It was an intelligent appraisal of what he
To you and me as adults it was an ornament in a foyer put
there to look pretty. His assumption was that it had
belonged to someone and was sitting there maybe waiting to
Claim we do when we go out and ballroom dance and reward
out recreation time with learning, absorbing and happiness.
We need no claim ticket for the lost shoe because we are
not lost. We have found a hobby that helps our health and I
mean both physical and mental. When we ballroom dance our
minds are activated into learning and being happy because we
are doing something new and fabulous that will lead us in
We are LUCKY because we found this thing that stimulates
us and keeps us going in social and daily activities.
Dancing lights a fire under us and fired up we are. The
flames are good flames and we become hot and happy.
Eleanor Roosevelt was right when she said no one can make
us feel inferior without our consent. We do not consent to
inferiority, we consent to superiority because we are
exceptional seniors and we are successful, Sophocles said
"success is the reward of toil." Reginald Leach said "You
must set yourself on fire."
The reward of the toil we do on ballroom dancing will
make us feel blessed. Blessed with our family, our children,
our grandchildren and our hobby-our dancing which makes us
I have just lost sixty-two pounds with the Weight
Watchers program. I am due the accolades because I took the
Weight Watchers program and made it work for me and I was
successful with the labor of dieting, exercising and cutting
down on unnecessary eating. Dancing is a good exercise when
doing Weight Watchers.
So setting ourselves with being ‘fired’ up and being
rewarded for our toil makes us complete and our reward is
the greatest thing we can reap. No one can make us dancers
feel inferior because we are now and forever quite superior
in a nice way, not an obnoxious way.
We are super seniors and delightful dancers and
exceptional enterprising examples of happiness in a senior
Keep on Dancing
You can email me at
Elita Sohmer Clayman